This post is a little different from the usual posts of home renovations and DIY projects, but I feel like I’m meant to write this for one of you. These words poured out of my heart within minutes and I know I’m suppose to share them with you. When God gives you a nudge, you listen. If you’re grieving at Christmas you are not alone, I see you.
The Christmas season is truly a magical season with all of the movies, decorations, family time, snow (for some of you) and all of the twinkle lights. I truly love the Christmas season and all that entails, but this Christmas season feels different. This year I wasn’t excited to decorate the house, go find a tree or do any of the Christmasy things that I usually love this time of the year. I felt overwhelmed and a little empty this year, so maybe that’s why I was so slow to decorate. We had bins of Christmas out for weeks before I finally finished decorating.
This hasn’t been the best year, actually it’s probably been the hardest year ever. We’ve been grieving at Christmas, just going through the motions of the season. In a way, I lost one of my best friends this year. I can’t just call her up to chat or pop in for a visit. I grieve for her. It’s a weird feeling to grieve for someone who’s still here that I can’t explain.
Then two weeks before Christmas, we lost my mother in law to cancer. A loss forever tied to the Christmas season. While we know she is in Heaven and no longer in pain, losing a loved one is hard, no matter the season. A precious soul is missing from your heart.
With each year, and any kind of loss, mile markers come and go. The first holiday, birthdays, a wedding, the arrival of a new baby. Any of those mile markers filled with so much joy can also bring sadness because someone is missing. The holidays can be filled with so many emotions from joyful and precious memories to loneliness and heartache.
If you’re dealing with seasonal depression, know you’re not alone. Grief comes in waves. One minute you’re okay and the next minute you’re reminded of that loss. Don’t try to keep those feelings in, talk about it, grieve and let the tears flow. Some days you might not cry at all, then a memory comes out of no where and you might cry again. Then one day that very memory that broke your heart, might make you smile. I find that when I pray and let it go, I can move forward.
We may never know the circumstance or even the grief that everyone we meet is facing, but we can lend a listening ear and a heart that cares. For some people, it’s not the most wonderful time of the year. They’re trying their best to get through the holidays. I see you.
I know it’s only a few days before Christmas, but if you know of someone who may be grieving at Christmas, reach out. Take a minute and call them up, offer to take them to the Christmas service at church or bring over a plate of cookies—just let them know you’re thinking of them. If it’s you that’s grieving at Christmas, I’m praying for you and sending you a virtual hug and reminding you that you’re not alone.
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